Dale Carneige, the famous author of How to Win Friends & Influence People pointed out that you can win more friends in two months by being interested in others than you can in two years by making others interested in you. 

Although Dale Carnegie died in 1955, his work in personal development still lives on. His book, How to Win Friends & Influence People first began publishing in 1937 and have since been the grandfather of “People Skills” books. 

Because of his great understanding of human nature, his books and fundamental teaching are just as popular as they were before. In fact, the title of his book is so widely used as a phrase, that some people who say it that may not even know where the phrase ‘how to win friends and influence people’ comes from.

Here are his six solid principles of making others like you: 

Becoming genuinely interested in others

I believe you have met some people who seem interested in you but some how you sense that they aren’t. There don’t seem to be genuine in you and we sometimes label them as ‘phoney’. This could be one rare case of ‘fake it until you make it’ that won’t work. So, how do you become genuinely interested in others? Well, you can start by asking them questions, learn more about what they do, what they like. everyone like to talk about themselves. Get them to talk about their dreams.

Smile 

There is nothing much to add here. If you are not doing it right now, remember to smile the next time you walk into a room. That smile is your people magnet. 

Use a person´s name

Remember that a person’s name is the sweetest and most important sound no matter what language it is. Just like in the old romantic movies: “Oh, John… John!” “Oh, Mary, dear Mary!”

Be a good listener

Encourage others to talk about themselves. If you do this sincerely and is interested in the other person, you cannot fail to encourage the other party to feel valued and appreciated. This is one of the key trait for anyone who have mastered people skills. 

Talk in terms of the other person’s interests

The same principle ass above. This principle stress the importance of listening and communicating in term of what the other person like. If you do not know what to talk about, let their response guide the direction of your conversation and you will enjoy a solid rapport that encourages friendship

Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely

This is a tricky one. This principle cannot be fake for long. Look for the good in others and respect their beliefs and lifestyles, even if they do not make sense to you. This flexibility is important if you are to respect others. 

His last three points, tie into the first. How to win friends and influence people is a book that reminds us that anything you do from a place of fellowship will have a good result. He uses this fable to prove his point:

The sun and the wind were arguing about who was the strongest. The wind pointed at an old man. The wind said that he’d prove his strength by getting the man to remove his coat. He blew and howled and blew some more.

The old man clung to his coat more than ever. When the wind finally gave up, the sun came out from behind a cloud and shone brightly. Soon the man was wiping his forehead and removing his coat.



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